Friday, March 19, 2010

Do You Suffer from SFMS?

SFMS is hard to deal with it, for everyone involved. It is irritating and heartbreaking all at the same time. It can ruin a trip, disrupt a dinner, kill a romantic evening like the smallest tiniest bug. So what is SFMS?

Screaming For Mommy Syndrome.

There, I've got it out. Acceptance is the first step. We are suffering, in our house, from a bad case of Screaming For Mommy Syndrome. I can't go to the grocery store, the mailbox, even the kitchen for coffee without my son throwing a fit. Sometimes to the point of turning blue**. I feel bad leaving him (even to get coffee, which is only 10 ft away). The look on his cute little face says "why are your leaving me?" and I just melt.

But I have to get stuff done (and I have to have my coffee in the morning, or I am not able to muster up my usual cheerful disposition). So what's a mom to do? Sometime I break down and just pick him up. I carry him while making coffee (YES, I am careful). I have taken him shopping with me and left the girls to take care of Ryan, I mean, left the girls with Ryan...

All of my kids have gone through this stage, and the length of it has always been different. I don't really remember our oldest having a hard time with this. Maybe for a month or two. Our middle child was like this from the time she was born almost until she turned 2. She's still very much a Mommy and Daddy's Girl (they both are, actually).

I should have expected this. I know that. This is my third round in this rodeo, after all. But it doesn't matter how many times you've done it. It's still a new experience because every child is different.

If you are going through this same thing, know that you are not alone. There are many mothers (and fathers, grandparents, etc) around the world who themselves are also trying to cook dinner, find crayons, drink coffee, feed the dogs, check the laundry, and soothe a baby all at the same time. That is the only consolation I can offer.

**a child screaming until they turn funny shades of pink, purple, and yes sometimes a tinge of blue, is perfectly normally. the worst thing that can happen is they pass out and then wake back up. this is a quote from my children's doctor.